Pages twenty-six through twenty-nine.

I’m not finished with the following scene, but there is a lot to it. It’s been a hard one for me to write. I think this is my fourth rewrite of it already. I play a lot of poker and I know all the subtleties of it and I keep wanting to include that in the script. But that’s a big no-no. The more complex you make a script, the worse it becomes. You don’t want to include what a character is thinking or feeling, but what his actions are. You also don’t want to include what the screenwriter is trying to convey with exposition. You’re not writing a book. You only want to write action that the audience can see and dialogue. Everything else is unnecessary.

(Pages 26-29)
INT. CASINO

Martin is sitting at a poker table with nine other POKER PLAYERS and a
DEALER.

The dealer deals two cards to everyone.

PLAYER #3
I fold.

PLAYER #4 throws his cards into the muck.

PLAYER #5
Fold.

PLAYER #6
Make it forty dollars.

DEALER
Forty dollars to play.

PLAYER #7 gives his cards back to the dealer.

PLAYER #8 is getting a cocktail from the waitress.

DEALER
Sir, it’s forty dollars to stay in.

PLAYER #8
Oh, I’m sorry.

He turns to his cards and looks down at them. He pushes his cards into the muck.

PLAYER #9
I call.

DEALER
We have one caller.

Martin looks down at his cards and see two kings. He calculates before he acts.

MARTIN
I raise. Make it two-forty.

DEALER
Another raise. It’s now two hundred and forty dollars to stay in.

PLAYER #1 folds.

PLAYER #2 folds.

Player #6 hesitates for several seconds before announcing…

PLAYER #6
I call.

DEALER
One caller.

PLAYER #9
How much is in the pot?

DEALER
I’m sorry sir, I’m not allowed to count it for you.

PLAYER #9
Two-forty, two-forty, four-eighty plus fifty-five is five-thirty. Eh, it’s almost three to one. I call.

DEALER
We have two callers.

The Dealer scoops all the chips into one big pot. He burns a card and turns over three cards on the center of the table.

King, king, ace.

PLAYER #3
Wow, what a flop.

Again, Player #6 hesitates before he acts.

PLAYER #6
I bet three hundred and fifty.

He stacks up the chips in front of him and pushes them forward.

PLAYER #9
That’s an easy fold for me.

He mucks his cards.

Martin plays with his chips as he calculates for several seconds.

MARTIN
I call.

Martin counts his chips and pushes them forward.

The Dealer collects all the chips and puts them into the pot. He burns a card and turns one to the center of the table.

Two.

Player #6 takes his time before he taps the table indicating a check.
Martin takes his time as well.

MARTIN
I’m going to bet.

Martin starts counting chips.

DEALER
Player has announced a raise.

MARTIN
Fourteen hundred dollars.

DEALER
Player has announced a raise of fourteen hundred dollars.

Player #6 looks visibly shaken. He leans back into his chair and crosses his arms. He waits a couple of minutes before announcing…

PLAYER #6
I call.

There’s a quiet murmur from the other players and everyone is leaning forward in their chairs.

DEALER
Player calls.

Player #6 counts his money and puts them forward.

The Dealer collects them and puts them into the pot.

The Dealer burns a card and turns the river to the center of the table.

Ace.

There’s another collective moan from the table.

PLAYER #3
That’s unbelievable.

Player #6 hesitates, but it’s shorter than the other times, before he announces…

PLAYER #6
I’m all in.

Martin stands and quickly shouts…

MARTIN
I call!

Player #6 turns over a pocket pair of aces.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: