This isn’t page four or five in the script, but the funny story I’m using for page two. It turned into a two page story.

INT. RESTAURANT – NIGHT

JIMMY, 50s, head of the Greek mafia and owner of the restaurant, is sitting at a large table with three other men, PETER, JOHN and ANGELO.

JOHN
…so I’m dating this girl and we’ve just been out on our second date and there’s nothing. No chimeia. No chemistry, nothing. I live about fourty-five minutes away from her. So on the way from her house, I decided to go to the strip club. I’m dating this attractive girl and nothings happening, so what the hell, you know?

ANGELO
You gotta do what you gotta do.

JOHN
I know, right? But I couldn’t remember where I was supposed to go. Was it Eight Mile or Seven Mile? I’ve just moved to Hamtramck and I knew it was one of those streets, but I couldn’t remember.

PETER
Uh oh, I know where this is going.

JOHN
Yeah. I chose the wrong street. I’m driving down seven mile and I don’t see anything. No bars, no clubs, nothing. Anyways, I get all the way to Van Slyke and I see a strip club on Van Slyke just off of Seven Mile and I think, ‘finally’. It looks like a regular titty bar and nice enough. I mean, no bells are going off or anything so I go in. I get in and look around and it’s all mavros. I’m the only white guy in there.

Everyone laughs.

JIMMY
So what did you do?

JOHN
Well, I wanted to leave, but I would have been too embarassed. So I sat down at the stage and ordered a beer.

Everyone laughs again.

JOHN
But that’s not the worst of it.

ANGELO
What, you came home with syphilis?

JOHN
Ha..ha..no. One of the girls sits down right in my face and pulls her panties open and shows me her pussy. I think she wanted me to eat it right there.

Everyone bursts into laughter again.

JOHN
I’m so scared, I just start throwing ones at her trying to get her to leave, but I was making it worse..

Everyone is in hysterics

MARTIN, 40s, a well dressed handsome man, walk from the kitchen and approaches the table.

MARTIN
Hey boss. We’ve got a problem in the kitchen.

JIMMY
Excuse me. Don’t finish the story, I want to hear the rest when I get back.
john
Will do, Jimmy.